Beyond Diaries

A toxic environment can hamper our mental growth and doom our creativity. Toxic people can be found anywhere, and anyone can develop toxic traits over time. In my opinion, sometimes the external environment and childhood experiences can devastate your personality, leading to the development of certain harmful traits. One might not wish harm upon others but they might be provoked to do so because of their past experiences.

However, living in such an environment is unhealthy for our physical and mental well-being and we should take utmost care to avoid instances where we come across negative behaviours. Often these traits are exhibited by someone very close to us like a friend, colleague, or even a family member. In these situations, it becomes difficult to discern and filter people demonstrating unhealthy traits which ultimately traps us in the constant spiral of torture and self-doubt.

Let’s try to analyse why people behave in the way they do and what can we do to protect our peace.

Demonstrating condescending behaviour

When people mock others and make them feel inferior it is usually because of their insecurities, lack of empathy, and a heightened sense of self-importance. It is also the emotional baggage that people carry which makes them feel superior to others. The article by Berkley Well-Being Institute highlights some of the condescending behaviours exhibited by people close to us and what can be done to tackle them. The best strategy in my experience is to build a boundary and retain self-confidence. Condescending behaviour is detrimental to personal relationships and one should be mindful while behaving with others.

Prioritizing self-goals over that of your closed ones

Prioritizing your goals is not a bad step anyone can take but sometimes it comes at a cost to others. While making choices in life especially when you live closely with someone, you should consider the goals and choices of the ones living with you. Humans can be selfish and tend to overlook the well-being and goals of their closed ones. On the other hand, some people try to put others ahead of themselves and are referred to as “other-centred” people. These two opposing personalities can affect you in varying ways and to varying degrees. You might also find yourself preferring to spend time with one group over the other because of your interests. Empathy is a rare personality trait and it is best to surround ourselves with someone empathetic, altruist, and discerning.

Nothing is satisfactory

People with toxic traits can sometimes cross the line between non-agreeableness and destructive criticism. Being non-agreeable is not a harmful personality trait but what is harmful is the criticism that follows which ruptures our self-confidence. I am in huge favour of constructive feedback rather than pervasive negative talk.

Conclusion

It is in our hands to protect our peace and we must try every day to do so. Let’s not run away from the truth and accept that people close to us can behave negatively. Their behaviour might be unintentional but it leaves us feeling demotivated and less confident. Sometimes, the very toxic trait can be exhibited by us and unknowingly or knowingly we might be hurting someone. Take a moment to reflect on your actions and those around you to get a sense of what is right and what is wrong. The empirical truth is we all harbour negativity but not everyone tries to ward off negativity and push themselves into being a better being. Our ultimate goal should be to live a peaceful and loving life with those around us and we can only achieve so by eliminating our toxic behaviours and embracing empathy.